Here is one of my favorite positive affirmations:

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself
- Unknown

Photo credit: jdurham from morguefile.com

The magic power of sales

Have you ever gone out during a sale to buy one thing you need, but actually come home with items you did not need at all as well? Often consumers are lured by ads promising “buy one, get one free”, or “second item half off”. These sales are actually not as good as they sound. The first one just means everything is 50% cheaper, but only if you buy more than you might want. If you only buy one item, you save nothing. The ’second item half off’ sale actually translates to a 25% sale. Now, between two stores advertising 25% off, or 50% off a second item, where do you think most people will go? Exactly, most people pick the second one, even though the deal is no better than the first. (Some might argue it is worse, because here too you are forced to consume more than you might want to).

How to avoid temptation

You can avoid falling for the clever advertising and psychological tricks sales drive on by:

• Being aware of the tricks (know what really is a good deal).
• Decide what you really want to buy before leaving home, and what you actually need.
• If you come across an amazing deal, consider whether it is your 12th pair of jeans, or just your 3rd and you could really use an extra one.

Here is an excellent article on the psychological power of the word “free”, and how it is used in sales. I can bet $100 that you’ve been swayed at least once by a “Buy X, get Y Free” sale. Who hasn’t thought of it as a great deal? Point is, now you know what it really means, and you can decide when it is a good idea to just keep your money instead.

James Arthur Ray, author of ‘harmonic wealth’ says you have to think, feel and act what you would like to achieve. A video of an interview with James Arthur Ray is posted below:

The trouble with these strategies is not ‘thinking’ about what you want, the trouble is perhaps the feeling and acting. After all; if you want to make $100.000 a year, and act like you already do.. many people might bankrupt themselves by spending as if they were wealthy. Certainly that doesn’t help the average American already in debt.
Clearly there are ways of changing your acting and thinking without going into debt. Mr. Ray is probably on to something when he says thinking about something is not enough; acting goes with the thinking. It is unlikely that the perfect job will be offered without some effort on your part, but focusing on what you want is without a doubt more likely to help you realize some steps that need to be taken to get there.

If you are one of those people who feels like 15 hours a week of time-waste (that’s like a part-time job!) is too depressing for words, but a shorter commute or other job is out of the question, then it is time to spice up your travel.

Eliminate the waste
Feel better about your commute by actually making it a productive time of the day. Although you can’t do laundry, spend time with the kids or respond to emails, there are other things you can do. By making it a time you are doing something for yourself, you can at least come to terms with the time spent traveling and even begin to enjoy it (a little).
Here are some ways to get productive while on the move:

Audiobooks
No time to read? Listen to your books on tape! Nowadays it’s more like ‘books on mp3′. There are a bunch of online resources for audiobooks, but the most straightforward would be Audible.com. If you like the classics, there is the open source (FREE) option of librivox.com. Librivox literally stands for ‘free voice’. The books are recorded by volunteer readers, and made available as free audiobooks online.

Learn a Language
Always wanted to learn how to order a coffee in Italian? No time for courses (really, who has the time these days!?), then audio-courses are a great solution. You’ll learn pronunciation , vocabulary and grammer in one. Find an audiobook that you might like and download it to an MP3 player. Audible.com has hundreds of language learning audiobooks available, and what is so great about this site is the fact that they let you listen to a sample of each book before you purchase. Listen to them all to see whether someone’s voice annoys you, or if you feel the book is too advanced or too simple for your needs. “That’s how I found the book that was right for me to catch up on my French,” says Angela K., e beginners student in French. “I am using the Michel Thomas method, it’s different than other audiobooks because it teaches you the language, not just fixed sentences,” she says, “and that works for me.”
At a bookstore you don’t get the chance to listen to the CDs, which gives Audible a major advantage over the conventional brick-and-mortar store.

There are also language podcasts you can subscribe to for free to boost your language learning. Try Radio Lingua, who produce podcasts such as the Coffee Break French language podcast.

Catch up on the News
Find a podcast you like and stick to it. You can catch up on world news, stocks and other programs on your iPod. Just get into the habit of plugging it in each morning or evening to download the latest programs, and you’ll see how fast time will start flying by. Browse iTunes or podcastalley.com for interesting shows.

Meditate
Do not attempt this if you drive to work! However, if you take public transit this might be just the time to zone out for a little while and meditate. As long as you don’t strike a pose in the middle of the train aisle and hold on tight to your belongings, you should be fine.

I take from this video that the power of a true dream and hard work pays off the same way as a savings account: time and compounding will help make your dream come true through hard work. The children in the film can serve as symbols; children have the innocent power to dream. They understand the simplicity of focus on a dream, and often children will go through great lengths to meet their goals. As adults, we often get side tracked from our dreams. It is time to remember that no matter how old we are, it is never to late to make dreams come true.

Take baby steps, be patient, work hard, and dreams will come true

How will I ever get done
I can’t get to sleep early, I have a million things to do
I’m exhausted and the dishes arn’t done, the bills are not paid yet, and the laundry also needs folding

These are common thoughts and frustrations keeping us up at night, putting strain and stress on our relationships and depriving us from enjoying our lives. Compound any regular person’s responsibilities with the crippling inability to be efficient because you are so bogged down by the many things that need to get done, or by natural causes such as depression or other mental illnesses, and it is easy to understand why bills are past due and the laundry is piling up.

If the things you have to do are keeping you up at night, you need to reorganize your life and learn to make some handy to-do lists.

When we have too many tasks on our hands, it is really difficult to keep track of each one that needs to be done and to prioritize. As a result, most people resort to the oh-so-familiar “where do I start? exclamation as they grab their head in frustration.

This is where a good To Do list comes in. So,… how do we go about making a To Do list that will work for you and give you the peace of mind you deserve?

How to prioritize to keep your sanity
Each one of us have a slew of bills to pay, house work to do, kids to look after, pets to care for and sometimes elderly or ill parents, our jobs and about a million other things to worry about.
Knowing what needs to be done when is half the battle; there is no point fretting over your visa bill if it is really just due in two weeks. However, keeping it on your desk with a pile of other papers that need to be filed or looked at will only make sure it is on your mind when it doesn’t have to be.

The trick is not just to make a to-do list to keep sane, the trick is to know what needs to be put on the to-do list.

Ask yourself: What needs to be accomplished today, what are the things that can absolutely not wait?
Here, you include tasks such as cleaning a spill in the kitchen, sorting laundry (only if you ran out of underwear and have the option of going to work commando the next day) and paying the bill that is already overdue.

This will be your to do today to-do list. It is imperative to remember ONLY the most urgent matters can go onto this list. Anything that can reasonably wait until tomorrow should not be written down yet.

Ask yourself: What do I need to get done by the end of the week?
Here, your next list will include those tasks that are less urgent but do need to get done in the next few days. This may - for example - include doing groceries, buying pet food, filing bank statements and paying this month’s bills.

Ask yourself: What would I like to get done this month?
On your last list you write down the tasks or issues you’d like to get done within the next 30 days. This is more of a goals-list than a to-do list because it can include enjoyable tasks as well. For example; you may want to look at your stock portfolio and do some research, you’d like to get the dryer fixed or shop for a new winter coat.

By writing out everything that needs to get done, and categorizing the tasks according to their urgency, you can learn to clear your mind and discover how satisfying it is to start striking items off the to-do list! If we are trying to remember everything we need to do, and we cannot effectively organize these things in our head, the sheer pressure of possibly forgetting something important can be nerve-wrecking and the weight of everything that could possibly need attention in the next month (or longer!) can feel paralyzing. This of course ends in you not being able to do anything at all, or at least be less effective than you could be if you were less stressed about your to-do list.

Yesterday I was in a store I meant to solicit for a product I am creating. I walked in, and the first thing I saw was a product very similar - almost identical - to mine. I left with tears in my eyes, defeated. Only as I cried on one of the busiest street of my city, one of the longest streets in the world, did I realize the one good thing about this discovery is the confirmation there actually is a market for my product. It takes a little courage to look at the world from a different perspective, but it makes all the difference in life.

I firmly believe that an inability of changing perspective is what separates the depressed from the non-depressed, and even the suicidal from those of us with mild depression.

However, feelings of failure, or generally negative feelings about our lives are strongly related to how we perceive our life. Perception is after all reality, and people who inherently have a positive attitude are less likely to feel - or become - depressed. To show you how perception can change someone’s attitude, and how easily the same situation can be perceived in two very radically different ways, I found a very interesting inspirational story on the inspirational journal.com, which I will quote here:

One day a father and his rich family took his son to a trip to the country with the firm purpose to show him how poor people can be. They spent a day and a night in the farm of a very poor family. When they got back from their trip the father asked his son,

“How was the trip?”

“Very good Dad!”

“Did you see how poor people can be?” the father asked.

“Yeah!”

“And what did you learn?”

The son answered, “I saw that we have a dog at home, and they have four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of the garden; they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lamps in the garden; they have the stars.

Our patio reaches to the front yard, they have a whole horizon.” When the little boy was finishing, his father was speechless.

His son added, “Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are!”

Isn’t it true that it all depends on the way you look at things? If you have love, friends, family, health, good humor and a positive attitude towards life - you’ve got everything!

Just some of the ‘positive encouragement’ thrown at negative people. Thousands of books have been written about ‘positive thinking’, and if we are to believe ‘the secret’, you are a few positive thoughts away from wealth, success and delirious happiness.

Is it really that simple?

Most negative people would say it is not. After all: thinking you are going to wake up rich tomorrow is not very realistic. Even if you have a lottery ticket lying on your night stand, the changes of actually waking up with a winning lottery ticket are pretty slim. Thus, a large number of people who are in some shape or form depressed (or just not very positive in general) argue that positive thinking strategies set you up for failure. If you think positively, and things do not ’start to happen’, then essentially you have fooled yourself and may feel even more depressed than you felt before.

Clearly this is not the intention of those positive thinking books and programs. However, the positive thinkings may argue that people who go into it with such a level of skeptisism are actually not really performing the techniques right to get a result.

Looking at it from a more objective perspective:
A recent study in Nature has shown that the same brain regions are involved in optimism as in depression. So perhaps depression is caused by our natural optimism levels being disturbed. After all; although thinking positively does not necessarily mean things will happen automatically, a healthy dose of optimism does make people more productive and not necessarily unrealistic.

The brain regions that light up when subjects are asked to think about positive things are the rostral anterior cingulate and amygdala. It’s not clear what goes wrong in these regions in depressed people, but they do seem to play a clear role in someone’s inability to look at the world from a more positive perspective.

Here is an optimism scale, just as a guide to determine whether you rank on the pessimistic, or optimistic range.

Consider a possible future event, such as receiving a bonus at work, or finding a new job. A realistic assumption would be somewhere in the neutral range, that at least the possibility of the event happening is as likely as the possibility that it does not happen.

Ask yourself: how likely do you think it is that you may get a bonus this year, be promoted, make new friendships, go on a nice vacation or imagine a realistic but positive goal that could fit your life.

Using this rough guide, you may see whether you are realistic, negative or positive:

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